But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
