I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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