I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
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