I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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