did you get engaged???
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Randomize
