Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize