Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
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you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
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And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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