you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I will pee on everything he values.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize