Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
