Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
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