Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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