I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
