If that was your dad, he is hot
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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