And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
