U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize