Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
