All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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