I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
