i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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