Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(310): View more from California

dude i need help, im throwing up blood.

(323): View more from California

no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.

(310): View more from California

oh, so thats why my junks red.

(323): View more from California

wow. cant help you there...

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(310): dude i need help, im throwing up blood. (323): no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up. (310): oh, so thats why my junks red. (323): wow. cant help you there... http://tfl.nu/yeir

Replies (15) Good night (676) Bad night (1479)
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(815): View more from Illinois

Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.

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(815): Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are. http://tfl.nu/ve28

Replies (34) Good night (5286) Bad night (556) Order T-Shirt
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(352): View more from Florida

I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex

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(352): I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex http://tfl.nu/73ql

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(201): View more from New Jersey

so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it

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(201): so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it http://tfl.nu/kytb

Replies (18) Good night (1201) Bad night (4660)
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(904): View more from Florida

bring the vodka.

(1-904): View more from Florida

i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?

(904): View more from Florida

we are.

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(904): bring the vodka. (1-904): i thought we were going to mcdonalds..? (904): we are. http://tfl.nu/1144

Replies (32) Good night (9517) Bad night (996)
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(716): View more from New York

I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?

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(716): I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone? http://tfl.nu/d362

Replies (8) Good night (1460) Bad night (2425) Order T-Shirt
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.

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(717): Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life. http://tfl.nu/od19

Replies (12) Good night (2076) Bad night (2734) Order T-Shirt
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(973): View more from New Jersey

I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.

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(973): I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst. http://tfl.nu/4se8

Replies (16) Good night (1152) Bad night (707) Order T-Shirt
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(734): View more from Michigan

What do you wear to apply at a strip club?

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(734): What do you wear to apply at a strip club? http://tfl.nu/ttz5

Replies (17) Good night (2094) Bad night (582) Order T-Shirt
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(520): View more from Arizona

So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?

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(520): So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend? http://tfl.nu/gpxm

Replies (3) Good night (706) Bad night (641)
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(205): View more from Alabama

Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.

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(205): Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation. http://tfl.nu/ln89

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(201): View more from New Jersey

I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.

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(201): I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part. http://tfl.nu/8mau

Replies (7) Good night (650) Bad night (1294) Order T-Shirt
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(540): View more from Virginia

Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.

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(540): Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too. http://tfl.nu/nqk1

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(904): View more from Florida

The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo

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(904): The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo http://tfl.nu/8wcq

Replies (8) Good night (723) Bad night (453) Order T-Shirt
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(616): View more from Michigan

Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.

(402): View more from Nebraska

20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun

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(616): Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night. (402): 20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun http://tfl.nu/qbq0

Replies (2) Good night (548) Bad night (321)

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