yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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