Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
