Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize