And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
