So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
you made out with another girl for some wings
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
