I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
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