Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(919): View more from North Carolina

Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.

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(416): View more from Ontario

I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.

(1-416): View more from Ontario

u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u

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(816): View more from Missouri

I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.

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(630): View more from Illinois

i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head

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(303): View more from Colorado

I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.

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(317): View more from Indiana

Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.

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(914): View more from New York

He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?

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(816): View more from Missouri

Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"

(816): View more from Missouri

I lied.

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(907): View more from Alaska

I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.

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