I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
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