That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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