can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize