just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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