just come out here and I will go home with you...
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
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