do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Dick very happy bro
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize