I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
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