have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
