I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
