i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize