I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize