When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize