I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
