i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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