you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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