Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
