I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize