Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize