i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
