But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I got inside last night via doggy door
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
