I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize