i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
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