So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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