so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
