My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Randomize